The 1975/If I Believe You/Meaning/Breakdown

This song demonstrates the character’s struggle to believe in God.

He envies those who can believe so easily. At the same time he is skeptical of such belief. He wishes he could believe so then he would not have to worry about feeling lost.

I’ve got a God shaped hole that’s infected
And I’m petrified of being alone
It’s pathetic, I know

And I toss and I turn in my bed
It’s just like I lost my head (lost my head)

He is implying that he is not the ideal candidate for heaven since he does things that are considered infectious and bad. He is afraid to be alone and wants forgiveness if God exists. He then implies that his mental health is not good. He has a lot of turmoil to deal with emotionally.

And if I believe you, would that make it stop?
If I told you I need you, is that what you want?
I’m broken and bleeding and begging for help
And I’m asking you Jesus, show yourself

He is an atheist and has tried to believe in God but it is difficult for him to do so. He then questions himself and ask for help. He is struggling to cope with his lack of direction and meaning in life and wants to find something to believe in which would benefit him, but he is cautious at the same time.

I thought I’d met you once or twice but that was just because the dabs
Were nice and opening up my mind – showing me consciousness is primary
In the universe and I had a revelation

He shows us that he only felt a higher consciousness when he got high and he had a revelation of some sort.

I’ll be your child if you insist
I mean, if it was you that made by body you probably shouldn’t have made
Me atheist
I’m the last thing you kiss

He mocks God for creating a child of God who is an atheist. Perhaps God did not make him. That is one of the reasons why he is suspicious and skeptical. 
I’m an evangelist
And “If you don’t wanna go to hell then Miss, you better start
Selling this”

He then says he is an evangelist which he clearly is not. He is simply showing a dark side of how people get others to believe by using fear. He is not really afraid therefore it is harder for him to believe. He is saying people use fear by saying you will go to hell if you do not believe. 

And if I believe you, would that make it stop?
If I told you I need you, is that what you want?
I’m broken and bleeding and begging for help
And I’m asking you Jesus, show yourself

repeat chorus

If I’m lost, then how can I find myself?
If I’m lost then how can I find myself?
If I’m lost then how can I find myself?
If I’m lost now then how can I find myself?
If I’m lost now then how can I find myself?
If I’m lost then how can I find myself?
Then how can I find myself?
If I’m lost now then how can I find myself?
Yeah, yeah, yeah
If I’m lost now then how can I find myself?
Yeah, yeah

Without having a higher power to believe in he is lost, and it is hard to make things of things. He lacks direction. He then asks how can he “find it/himself” if he is lost.

He is conflicted.

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